Monthly Archives: March 2012

A Day Late & A Chapter Short…

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Ok, I’m back! Where did I go, you ask? Nowhere, actually. I’m just a day late. No, I’m not pregnant, gosh you sound like my sister! I’m a day late in regards to my regular blogging schedule. What’s that? You didn’t know I had a blogging schedule? Dammit! I knew this would happen…Yes, generally I try to concoct a post every third day. Can I use the word concoct there, or does that word work better when referring to making potions and stuff? Anyway, sometimes I don’t get around to it until the fourth day. And other times, I miss several weeks, ie the entire month of February.

But alas, I have decided to quit my job and blog full time!

Just kidding. But I am going to post regularly on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays. Yes, I know today is Thursday. This mission goes into effect next week…. Mark your calendars people!

One might assume I got loads of writing done since I wasn’t blogging? Ummm…I think I hear my mother-in-law calling me…

Okay, so I didn’t get much writing done. Didn’t finish Chapter 14. But I will definitely have it finished…soon. Rather ambiguous, I know. But in the meantime, let’s talk about what I already have written. A few posts ago, I outlined what’s happened so far in Chapter 1-5 (if you missed that, are new to JJE, or you just want to reminisce and/or bask in my awesomeness, click here). In Chapter 6, Officer Brighthouse meets with the Medical Examiner to discuss the condition of Lyla’s latest victim. Here’s a quick excerpt:

Officer Brighthouse reached the morgue, jogged past the front desk, Red Bull in hand, and took the steps two at a time to the third floor, where Dr DiCicco’s office was located. He tried his best to collect himself and contain his excitement and curiosity, before knocking on the thick, frosted glass door. When he heard LeeAnn’s voice from within, he slowly opened the door and entered, not sure what to expect from his visit.

LeeAnn was sitting cross-legged behind a large, gray, L-shaped, metal desk. The lifeless gray paint that covered the walls and ceiling was chipped and peeling. The windows bore the same thick frosting as the door, prohibiting the summer sunlight from shining through. The artificial, fluorescent lighting did the doctor’s face no justice, for she was rather attractive for an older woman. She had shoulder-length brown hair that was thick and shiny. Her big, round eyes were equally dark, and probably the softest part of her face. Her sharp bone structure was indicative of her Italian lineage and gave her a forbidding appearance. She reminded Brighthouse of an archetypical librarian or school teacher: especially today, with her hair pulled back and reading glasses perched on the tip of her nose. Just as she looked up to greet him, he interrupted her for the third time that day. “Okay LeeAnn, start with the prelim, and explain everything to me… like I’m a four-year-old.”

She gave him a queer look.

“Sorry, I was up watching Philadelphia before shift last night.” She continued to stare at him, so Brighthouse continued. “You know. Denzel Washington. Tom Hanks. Denzel is a lawyer defending Tom Hanks, who has AIDS. You had to have seen it, where –”

“Officer Brighthouse, if you’re done playing Siskel and Ebert, I have an autopsy report to review.”

“You’re right. Of course. I’m Sorry. It must be all the Red Bull. I gotta do something to get through these graveyard shifts.” He smiled hesitantly. “Anyway, please, continue.”

“The preliminary examination is basically an external examination. In the case of Alex Livanos –”

“Who?”

“That was his name. He did have a name, you know. Anyway, the prelim yielded no knew information, just like I told you over the phone. Based on the lack of rigor mortis and the victim’s un-fixed lividity, he died between midnight and 1am on Saturday. There were no visible bruises or marks of any kind. No trace elements, either.”

“Wait, you said, between, midnight and 1am?” Brighthouse took out a pen and a small notepad from his left breast pocket and began taking vigorous notes.

“That’s correct. Why? Is that significant?” LeeAnn peered up at him over her dark-rimmed reading glasses.

“Might be.”

Getting Arrested for the Greater Good… Or Research Gone Too Far?

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Without giving away too much about the chapter I’m currently working on, most of it takes place in a police precinct. While I was describing the interior of the office, I realized that I’ve never really been inside a precinct. I was basically just writing about what I see every day on reruns of Law & Order and CSI. Is this acceptable?

"I know you're new here, so lemme tell you where the water cooler is..."

“I know you’re new here, so lemme tell you where the water cooler is…” 

Should I visit the precinct in Philly that I was describing? I wondered if they would even let me in if I walked through the door. Especially if I wasn’t there on official police business: filing a report, bailing someone out, or whatever. I imagine the visit would probably go something like this:

“Hi, you don’t mind if I poke around and jot down some stuff, right?”

“Am I here to file a police report? No, I’m author.”

“Yes, I know you haven’t heard of me, I’m not published yet. But I have a blog!”

“Hey, wait, let go of me! At least tell me if your desk chairs swivel and what corner your water cooler is in!”

Hmmm…

But I really, really want the setting to be authentic. So, what do I do?  At this point I became truly irrational. I should get arrested! Something minor. I’ll spray paint my blog address on an overpass in broad daylight. (Research and free ad space! Two birds with one stone! Score!) This way, I get brought in, I check out the layout, sit in the chair I’m handcuffed to, ask for some water and note which direction the officer heads to get to the kitchenette area. Gotta see where they keep that pesky water cooler, right? Sounds like a plan. Just have to work up the nerve…and figure out how those grafitti artists get up there in the first place.

But it would all be worth it to not have a Philly cop (or criminal, I don’t discrimate. Read one, Read all!) finish that chapter in my novel and be like,”Pshhh, thats not where the water cooler is and the chairs are way cooler .”

Awarded the Kreativ Blogger Award!!!

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Instantly I have turned into Sally Field, and I can’t stop exclaiming, “They like me, they really like me!” (I’m sure I’m not the only one to do this)

Thank you so much Tonya Kerrigan! Really, a million times thank you!

Ok, I have thanked the brilliant Tonya Kerrigan (just millimeters above, in fact) for the nomination and now I will attempt to fulfill the rest of my obligation, blabbing about myself and nominatiing other fabulous bloggers. Here goes!

 

List 7 Things About Myself That My Readers Will Find Interesting:

  1. I’m a tomboy. Don’t let the mascara and red lipstick fool you. I own more sports paraphernalia (jerseys, hats, t-shirts, etc) than I do high heels or little black dresses.
  2. I have six tattoos, one of which I obtained from a gigantic, barefoot, non-english-speaking Polynesian man in Tahiti. My husband and I each got one while we were there on our honeymoon. People think it was risky, but we have obviously lived to tell about it.
  3. Some aspects of my novel’s main character are patterned after me. Not the serial killer part though.
  4. I would love to learn krav maga,  how to shoot a crossbow, and how to throw a knife. But I swear I’m not a serial killer.
  5. I firmly believe zombies will take over the Earth one day as a result of overzealous medical research. Judge me if you want, but when it happens I won’t save you with my crossbow.
  6. I hate chick flicks, but my top three favorite movies are The Princess Bride, Pretty Woman, and The Runaway Bride. Go figure…
  7. I’m starving right now because I was so excited about this award that I skipped breakfast to write this post…That was two hours ago.

Next:

Nominate 7 bloggers, let them know they’ve been nominated, and provide their links.

And the nominees are:

  1. Jennifer M Eaton
  2. Joe Stories
  3. Life and Laughter
  4. Finding Subjects
  5. The View Outside
  6. Elizabeth Barrow
  7. Trust Your Story

PHEW! That was difficult! First I had to talk about myself (which I loathe), then I had to pick only 7 fellow bloggers to nominate. I’m exhausted. Very content though.

 

The Girl With The Ikea Table, er, I Mean, Dragon Tattoo

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So, I’m halfway through The Girls With the Dragon Tattoo Trilogy. Its been a week since I’ve started and I’m only halfway through. Its killing me. I’ve read other trilogies in less than 36 hours. The books are interesting enough, but seriously slow goings. I’m hoping to at least finish them by the end of the month. This way, when I order the NetFlix of the first movie, which I currently assume will be faster-paced, I can call it a personal April Fool’s joke when its just as slow and tedious. Still looking forward to it. Anyway, here are my thoughts so far:

*Disclaimer: You thought I was going to say “Spoiler Alert” didn’t you? Quite the opposite. I’m not gonna ruin anything. Scout’s Honor (I was a Girl Scout for about a week, that counts right?).*

  1. The books take place in Sweden. EVERYTHING is purchased at Ikea. Its ridic. You don’t read American books where every scrap of furniture is shouted out as having originated at Sears.
  2. The books take place in Sweden. (Yes I re-wrote that on purpose. For effect.) Apparantly “Svensson” and “Johansson” are very common last names and “Nils” is a very common first name. These names are probably the American equivalent to (or is it equivalent of?) ”Smith,” “Johnson,” and “Mike.” HOWEVER, naming a main character “Svensson,” then naming another, albeit inconsequential, character “Svensson” is terribly confusing. Especially when they are only referred to by their last name. All of sudden its like, “Svensson drove North towards Flakenboppin” and you’re all like, “What? I thought Svensson was in Frickendloppin.”
  3. The books take place in Sweden (noticing a pattern?). All the streets, cities, areas, and stores (besides the all-familiar Ikea) have a name like “Kleppenoggin” and “Poopensnottin.” Extremely difficult to remember where everyone is at all times. Plus, I don’t know about you, but I hate it when I can’t pronounce something, even if its in my head.
  4. Sweden is the country that never sleeps. And the books take place in Sweden (I switched it up. See what I did there?). Seemingly, the Swedish never consume any beverage other than coffee. Ever. Every character is forever making coffee, drinking coffee, offering coffee, stopping for coffee, and turning on the coffee maker. No matter what time of day or night. Coffee, coffee, coffee. Ironically, constantly reading about coffee is exhausting.
  5. I wish Stieg Larsson had hired Jennifer M. Eaton’s beta reader to deal with his characters’ incessant coffee consumption. (For the record, I wish I could hire her beta reader)

If I ever make it to Sweden, do you think I might happen upon a “Dragon Tattoo Tour” in which a tour guide by the name of Nils Svensson-Johansson brings me to an Ikea in Glikkensnoppen for coffee?

Next blog post will include something about my nifty little novel. Probably a summary of Chapter 6. Or maybe something completely random. I’m open to suggestions. : )

Liar, Liar! Book on Fire!

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Unintentionally, I was almost a liar. The penalty would have been for Hampton University graduates everywhere to set my book on fire and call me a lazy, fraudulent author. Oh, the shame!

Let me explain: at the conclusion of my last post, I included an excerpt from the beginning of Chapter 5 that introduced us to the final main character: Psycholoogist, Dr Jillian Atford. The paragraph I quoted did not specifically acknowledge that she was a ‘shrink,’ but I had mentioned it in the past, and fully trusted that my royal followers studied every word I said as if they were preparing for their SAT’s. However, for those that might be new to JJE (and I welcome you with open online arms), I had planned on also including the next paragraph, which delves into the details of Dr Atford’s education and career up until that point. You’re probably wondering what happened to that mysterious paragraph. Calm down, I’m getting there. Geez…

What happened was this: I had written that Jillian received her Bachelor’s in Psychology at Hampton University, then returned there later to complete her Master’s and Doctorate in the same subject. Small problem: Hampton doesn’t have a graduate or doctorate program in Psych. Oops!

My only guess is the same Universal power that helped me name a character last week (see this previous post to learn of my recent working relationship with the Universe), also provided me with a hunch that encouraged me to visit Hampton’s list of degree programs. So now I have to rewrite a small chunk of Jillian’s life. No biggie.

So, before I scurry off and fix that inconvenient snafu (and add the dialogue to the chapter I’m currently working on), here’s a bulleted summary of events from Chapters 1-5!

  • Lyla Kyle, an accomplished artist, goes on a date…and lures him to her “studio,” a self-storage unit. She kills him with a shot of succinyl choline to the nape of his neck. She also extracts a syringe-full of his blood.
  • Overly zealous Officer Jason Brighthouse and his cynical partner, Byron Blakely, are called to the scene where Lyla’s victim has been dumped. The Medical Examiner can find no obvious cause of death.
  • Lyla awakens from a terrifying nightmare about the day she discovered her mother’s dead body ten years prior. She then mixes her victim’s blood into a cannister of red paint, and completes her latest “trophy” painting. Later, she visits her “studio” at the self storage facility and stores the painting in a trunk with the others.
  • Lyla heads to her appointment with psychologist, Jillian Atford (who apparantly did NOT get her master’s and doctorate degrees from Hampton University, Grrr).
  • Lyla has only had a few previous sessions with Jillian, and she had always remained standoffish. This time Jillian presses her with more personal questions and Lyla storms out mid-session. Jillian is bewildered, not only by Lyla’s odd behavior, but also because she seems extremely familiar to and Jillian can’t place her finger on it.

Engrossing? I hope so.

“Oh Susannah!” and How the Universe Stepped In

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My last post dealt with my difficulty in finding a sufficient first name for my main character’s mother. Then, suddenly and out of thin air, an old (folk?) song popped into my head:

Oh Susannah!

Oh don’t you cry for me,

For I come from Alabama with a banjo on my knee.

And in my head this little diddy made a home. For hours. Until finally, I decided to name Lyla Kyle’s mother Susannah. It was like the universe knew it had to be done, so it provided me with a name so I would stop exclaiming “Why, universe, WHY??” with both hands upturned to the heavens. (Disclaimer: I swear I’m not that dramatic)

However, if the universe really had a heart, it would have extracted its stupid song from my brain after it had served its purpose. But alas, it remained. For even more hours than previously thought possible. I even remixed the song in an effort to appease the universe:

 Oh Susannah!

I wish that you could see,

that I named my character’s mom after you,

with the laptop on my kneee.

The song did eventually disappear from my consciousness, thank goodness.

Of course, after enduring this ridiculous debacle, I came across a brilliant fellow blogger with a plethora of Name Game-Game Changers. Have a look for yourself:

http://the-view-outside.com/2012/03/15/the-naming-game/#comment-792

Thankfully I have at least one more character to name and (hopefully) many more books to write, so I’ll have a chance to employ her many ingenious methods. Which reminds me, I should get to work on the next chapter. So, as promised, here is an excerpt from Chapter 5 (the opening, actually) that describes Dr Jillian Atford, the last main character to be introduced here at JJE.

“Dr Jillian Atford was born to do this work. A strong woman with soft, brown, shoulder-length twists in her hair, she exuded a warmness that instantly put her clients at ease. It was like she had a past with each patient; they all felt as though they had known her for years. Her voice was smooth and buttery, like honey or maple syrup. The latter of which was coincidentally the exact color of her skin. She was well-spoken and proper, which all but disguised her subtle Bronx accent. Her office was as homey as her demeanor. Instead of basic, drab colors like eggshell, taupe, and beige, Dr Atford employed bold earth tones: rich browns, mahogany, and burgundy. Modern cultural masks and sculptures adorned the space, but not overwhelmingly so. In addition, just over Dr Atford’s desk, hung a large, oil painting of the African Savannah, complete with tall swaying grass and a pride of lions amid roaming herds of water buffalo, gazelles, and zebras. The painting reeled clients in, not unlike Dr Atford’s personality.”

The Drain of the Name Game…

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How on earth does one come up with suitable character names? I absolutely LOVE the name of my main character, Lyla Kyle, and that just came to me, kinda. Well, mostly because I liked the character of the same first name on one season of Dexter. I thought it would work because both ladies have long, dark hair and psych problems. (That doesn’t consitute plagiarism, does it?) Her last name came out of nowhere though. I just thought it had a nice ring to it. It does, I’m sure of it.

As for the cops in my book, I just pulled those names out of thin air. *Pluck*  Jason Brighthouse. *Pluck* Byron Blakely. Tada!

The psychologist, Jillian Atford, is patterned after one of my good friends (who recently passed away, thus propelling me to finish writing my book), so their names are similar.

The medical examiner? LeeAnn DiCicco. I reached deep for that. I gave her the exact same name as that of my 6th grade math teacher. I remember getting in trouble for doodling a picture of a personified rat and titling it: Mrs DiCicco as a Bitchy Rat. Haha! … my folks didn’t find it funny. But, you can see why her name stuck with me.

But, while I was writing my most recent chapter (which I finished revising today, I might add–Go ME!), I had the hardest time coming up with names for inconsequential characters: fleeting characters that mean nothing and are only there to help flesh out the pasts of the main characters. You would think it wouldn’t matter, but I find myself saying, “I already have characters whose names start with a B” and “I can’t have a character whose name ends in an A like Lyla’s!”

*sigh*

By the way, I’m still lacking a sufficient name for Lyla’s mother and resigned to calling her “Mrs Kyle” throughout the entire chapter. Be that as it may, I’m open to any and all suggestions…

Rock Out With My Blog Out!

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Man, I love that title (^)!!

Not only do I already have my next blog post drafted, but I’m also checking in to report that I finished the rough draft of Chapter 13 yesterday! I plan on going through it today to start revising, proofreading, and adequately “fleshing” it out. I’m pretty excited about the direction that everything’s going in. Its like the novel has a mind of its own. Can you tell I’m a fly-by-seat-of-my-keyboard kind of author? I think it’ll work out though. I wonder if anyone else writes like this? I like my little writing process, but at the same time, I spend a lot of time checking what I’m currently writing against previous chapters to make sure everything matches up. But that’s gotta be common, right? I mean, who the hell knows every single previously written little detail of their work as they get deeper and deeper into their plot? However, I am trying to streamline my craziness, so I’m trying to also separately map out the sequel as I write so I’ll be better prepared. Does that make sense? Nevermind, I’m getting ahead of myself… so here is the opening to Chapter 4 (Next up will be an introduction to the novel’s resident psychologist, Jillian Atford).

“Lyla sat up with a start, her black satin nightgown glued to her frame from sweat. It was 4:30 in the morning and she had had ‘the’ nightmare again. For the past few months, since the ten year anniversary of her mother’s death began to grow nearer, she had been experiencing a terrifyingly realistic dream where she wakes up to find that the floors in her house are covered with fresh blood. As she makes her way through the hallways to investigate, she finds her mother wandering around and bleeding profusely from one of her wrists. The most frightening aspect of the dream lies in its realism: she could hear her mother’s muffled cries; she could see her mother’s lifeless, glazed-over eyes; she could feel the soggy, blood-soaked carpet beneath her feet; she could even smell her mother’s perfume, sourly tainted by the coppery smell of blood. Regrettably, each and every time she experiences the torturous dream, just when she thinks she’ll be able to reach out to her mother, hold her, help her, save her: she wakes up.”

 

It’s my blog, and I’ll cry if I want to!

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Wowza! It. has. been. AWHILE! Did everyone miss me? What am I saying, of course you did!

Allow me to explain my prolonged absence: I’m a self-destructing crazy person. The end. No really. Remember my last post when I mentioned I had corrected a few errors my husband had pointed out? Well, after he read those chapters, that was all he had to contribute. Usually there’s a whole lot of “Hurry up!” “I wanna know what happens next!” and “Reading your novel is better than sex!” Just kidding, of course he never said that last one…Anyway, he didn’t do any of that. So instead of acting like a normal person and asking him if he liked the direction the novel was heading in, I proceeded to over-think his lack of commentary (if you could call what I was doing ‘thinking’). I distorted the situation into something like “I suck” and kinda gave up for awhile. Then one day he asked me if I had been doing any writing. NOW I decided to tell him how I had been feeling. His response: “I didn’t want to nag you.” AHHH!!! If only there was some way I could have known this sooner! Like, if I had talked to him and stuff. So, yeah, I’m an idiot. A moron. A cretin. But I’m back beetches!!!